How to make a great first impression.

by Admin on September 30th 2008, 10:43 am

How to make a great first impression.

Here are seven surefire tips on how to make a great first impression
By Carlin Flora
Psychology Today

We all been there at least once meeting someone for the first time. You wait for an awkward moment of silence to pass, and then make meaningless conversation about the weather. The first impression is the decisive moment where you decide if a person is worth your time, so, you'd better have a game plan to stand out from the crowd.

So, here are seven surefire tips on how to get past hello and on to a first date.

1. Curb conversational narcissism
He s talking about his new Subaru, which reminds you of the battle you waged and won with that smarmy Hertz-rental-car dealer in Miami last month. This faux segue is a big no-no, says Valerie White, a psychologist and business consultant. We are tempted to share impressive things about ourselves, but the one idea you should keep in mind is how am I making the other person feel? Actively encourage others to talk about themselves, and respond genuinely without bringing it back to you.

2. Don t betray your anxiety
If you re not quick-witted or well-versed in certain subjects, you can still make a great impression, White says. Just focus on the other person. This in turn will take the pressure off you. However, avoid interrogating a new acquaintance. If you’re jittery, control movements such as leg twitching. And remember to speak slowly nervousness makes us talk too fast.

3. Fake a sunny mood
Be yourself is solid first-impression advice from cognitive scientists and self-help gurus alike. But it s worth suppressing a bad mood when you meet someone new. There is a contagion effect, White says. A bad mood will bring the other person down, too. Try to start off well, and then share what sbothering you.

4. The eyes have it
If you want to get to know a stranger, break with body language conventions by catching her eye for more than a second. When you first meet someone focus on your eye contact, your smile and your posture, says Nicholas Booth man, an author and lecturer. If you notice somebody’s eye color and you say great to yourself, you will actually be smiling, and you will give off a super mood.

5. Get in sync
Adjusting your posture, voice, words and gestures to match those of a new acquaintance is critical, says Booth man, because we are attracted to others who are just like us. People respond when you speak at their pace, agrees White. To establish an instant rapport, mirror your new friends head nods and tilts.

6. Use flattery, sparingly
People like to be flattered, White says. Even if they suspect you are brownnosing, they still like it. But use flattery judiciously focus on the other persons accomplishments or achievements. This works well when a person believes you don’t say ingratiating things to just anyone.

7. The do-over
You arrive at a party fuming over a parking ticket. A cheery guest introduces herself, but you brush her off and head for the bar. You’ve made a bad impression, but you can recover if you demonstrate self-awareness, says White. Pull her aside and say, I wasn’t myself earlier. Show your sense of humor: I see you met my evil twin. And remember to cut others slack if they make a bad impression on you.